My Mama

Below, my long-time friend Mike Ayers presents Mama and Daddy with a special certificate honoring them for hosting our traditional Christmas singalong and get-together for more than three decades. This year, 2009, Mama had fallen the night before, and had to listen flat on her back in the next room. Two days later would find her in the hospital.

Our Christmas plans didn't originally include Mama being in the hospital, but after her second fall in four days, that's where she ended up. Just as when she was hospitalized 10 months ago, the doctors gave her little hope of recovery and called our family in to say goodbyes. Well, as some of you have come to expect, Mama has surprised the experts once again. Her doctor as much as said that she has used up three or four of her nine lives, but the fact remains, she is progressing to the point she should be able to be moved to a nearby rehab center in a day or two.

Yes, my Mama, Elizabeth Anne Black Loyd, is an amazing woman with an amazing story. Only those fortunate enough to know her well realize what a strong woman she is, even at age 88. Physically, she has defied logic, not breaking any bones in these two recent falls. She has emerged from unconsciousness and erratic vital signs to beat the usual odds for her demographic group (take my advice, don't bet against her). Spiritually, she has awed her caregivers with her quiet faith, acceptance of her circumstances,and determination to get stronger so she can go home. She has overcome one health obstacle after another, and we have learned not to set our goals too low--she'll make us look foolish every time.

When Judy and I were called back to Atlanta after the second fall, Mama was on a respirator and her chances looked bleak--everyone thought. A day later, my brother received a 3 a.m. call that she was fading fast, and we rushed back to the hospital. What we saw was not a slipping away, but the beginning of her marathon struggle to cling to the life she cherishes so much. Now, one week after being admitted under dire circumstances, she is feeding herself, asking when she can get her hair done, and focusing on getting stronger so she can return home. She brought tears to my eyes when she said with great effort, shortly after her breathing tube was removed, I'm trying so hard to stay alive. I know that in theory, you should give your dying loved ones permission to die so they can go in peace, but that wasn't the way things transpired. On a lighter note: it would be flattering to think she wants to live just to see her family, but my brother says all she talks about is when he can take her out to eat again!

Even my family, who has seen her do these wondrous recoveries before, dared not hope for such a dramatic repeat. Mama's pastor, according to a friend, referred to Mama's startling recovery from the pulpit Sunday morning as "Lazarus-like." I don't presume to think we deserve or that God owes Mama such a blessing as we are receiving. But I do believe that God is pleased to glorify Himself through his outpouring of mercy. I also believe that He has chosen Mama as a vessel worthy of bringing praise to Himself by her longsuffering faithfulness, and her visible testimony, both to those who believe and those who doubt God's sovereignty. I do believe it would be both selfish and presumptuous to ask God to give Mama to us longer if He has other plans. So I choose the prayer that is referred to in my beloved Mitford books as "the prayer that never fails"--Thy will be done!

In her latter years, God has continued to bless Mama with surprisingly strong eyesight, and she has used it to read scriptures and devotional books diligently every day. Much of the time she's not reading, she's deep in prayer. Not for herself, but for others. It struck me, that her life has been a fulfillment of one of her favorite hymns, Others, from the old Cokesbury hymnal.

Others

1. Lord, help me live from day to day

In such a self forgetful way

That even when I kneel to pray

My prayer shall be for Others.

2. Help me in all the work I do

To ever be sincere and true

And know that all I'd do for You

Must needs be done for Others.

3. Let "Self" be crucified and slain

and buried deep: and all in vain

May efforts be to rise again,

Unless to live for Others.

4. And when my work on earth is done,

And my new work in heav'n's begun,

May I forget the crown I've won,

While thinking still of Others.

Chorus: Others, Lord, yes, others,

Let this my motto be,

Help me to live for others,

That I may live like Thee.

Of Mama's countless favorite scriptures, one she draws strength from is from Philippians 4:8:

Finally brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things
are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever
things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue,
and if there be any praise, think on these things.

While Mama lies in a hospital bed, still dwelling, not on herself, but on her family and her God, He uses her still as a testament to those of us of notably lesser faith. God may choose to take her at any time, but she has fought the good fight and kept the faith, and perhaps she will inspire more of us, her loved ones, to go and do likewise. More miracles will be reported in this space in the coming days-- I'm sure of it!